Unstoppable
by starooo
Summary: She smiles at you like she did when you first saw her. From that moment on, you know you're unstoppable. Things should have been better if it went your way. You know you're right even when deep inside you know you're just being so goddamn stubborn.


**Unstoppable**

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"I will leave the Academy with her… together with that person." She cried. Your body couldn't move from shock. "I will escape to the outside world… with my mother."

You have no idea what to do. You feel stupid for just standing there and doing nothing. You look over at your best friend and frown. He just stared at her and looked calm. He always took situations maturely. He looks like though he's okay and that he didn't give a damn. But you know that he does. He was always the better actor. He's doing so much better than you were. You envied him.

You always had.

And you're mad at yourself for being jealous of him. You're not supposed to. You're his best friend. You weren't Ruka without Natsume and he wasn't Natsume without you.

You ask yourself why you're acting this way. But you don't know that answer. You probably even won't try finding it.

Because you know you're a coward. Natsume Hyuuga is so much better than you. You knew that. You hated that. Everybody would look at you and talk about how cool you are. But you know it's because of Natsume that you have this kind of popularity.

When you were little, people used to talk about you because you go around town in a Mercedes Benz and a French mother. But you know, even without someone telling you, that you are nothing without these things. Without the riches, the Parisian blood and your supposedly best friend, you're nothing but plain old Ruka Nogi.

And nobody would want you.

That's why you came to a conclusion that you'll go to the Academy to be with Natsume. You demand nothing from your parents but freedom, and for the first time in your entire life, you find yourself being the Ruka Nogi that even you yourself didn't know.

Ever since Mikan Sakura came. She had drastically changed your world. You know that. She had made you fall for her hard. Everything went zero gravity ever since she was around. You even thought she had the Alice of hypnotizing people.

It was stupid, but you even thought she had you under her spell all this time.

You remember the first time you saw her. She was lying down in a couch and Natsume was sitting on her. You thought it was perverted. But you weren't surprised. Natsume had always been the perverted one.

And then he tells you how you're late. And you scoff and tell him whose fault was it. And then you'd both laugh. Mikan also saw the private joke you made. She even noticed how strong your friendship was. At first you think she was trying hard to be in with the crowd—with _your_ crowd. But then you suddenly noticed that it was beginning to be _her_ crowd. At roughly four months after her arrival, everyone was wrapped around her finger. Even you.

And you couldn't bring yourself to admit that you had fallen in love with this ditzy, freckled-face brunette.

And you shouldn't.

You shouldn't because Natsume Hyuuga's in love with her too. And you think that it's wrong to be in love with her just because you owe him so much. You owe him your supposedly Ruka fan club members, you owe him that one time when you got this manga you've always wanted and you know it was him who gave it to you because he's the only person who knew, and most importantly, you owe him the three bright, metal stars pinned in your uniform that was originally supposed to acknowledge your Alice strength. But you know it's all bullshit because you had them in exchange of Natsume's blood and sweat.

And all that brings you to think that you have no right to go against him. You think that this is the only thing you can make it up for him. At first you think it's easy. All you have to do is give up Mikan Sakura, right? What's the damage in that?

Days pass, weeks go by and years take place. You witness everything Mikan and Natsume go through… _without you_. And as you see the smile on her face, you think, you _can't_ possibly give up on her.

The thought of it disgusts you. You're supposed to be giving way for your best friend, dammit.

But then a voice inside of you says that Mikan Sakura's the only person who can change your life the way you've always wanted it to be.

And so you decide, you just _have_ to keep fighting.

Even when you know you're just being so goddamn stubborn.

"It's going to be okay, really." She whimpered. You realize the situation you're in. She can't possibly be going. You deny it, but you know that she is. All that you've sacrificed for Natsume and for her are all gone. She's going. After a few weeks she'll be gone.

And it's all going to be you and him again.

And you'll be ol' cowardly Ruka Nogi. And you don't like that to happen. No one else but Natsume Hyuuga will believe in you. Everybody will look at you with unedifying pity. And you'll hate them. You'll hate yourself.

"Yes, it probably will be." Natsume forced himself to speak. Everyone started agreeing.

Probably, you think.

And you look at that heartbroken expression Mikan had when she looked at Natsume.

And you think, you could have done much better than that.

You think about what would've happened if it went the way you thought it should be. And then you shake the thought away.

Because you shouldn't be thinking like that.

You're supposed to be feeling sad. You are, but not entirely. You're blaming everything on yourself. On Mikan. On Natsume.

And you know you're right.

Even when you know you're just being so goddamn stubborn.

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**Author's Notes:**

I have this story since last week. I don't know why I didn't even notice this document in my laptop. Haha. :) Well now I've uploaded it. I hope you'll review since it's my first time writing in a 2nd person POV. This is like… a big achievement for me. ;)

And yet again, Ruka Nogi is my main character. Maybe I have this little obsession with Ruka and angst. Maybe. I don't know. And yes, I should do justice for him. He always ends up being the lonely one. :(

It's kind of creepy and the story doesn't even make sense and… and I'll leave it right there since I'll start babbling about some pretty useless stuff if I don't. Haha.

So yeah.

Review? :)


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